Thursday, February 23, 2012

LaRon "Bane" Landry

By now, everyone is aware of the new installment of The Dark Knight featuring Hines Ward in a cameo. Those people are probably also aware of super-villain Bane. If you're not aware of Bane, he's a juicing, muscle-bound freak designed to destroy the Bat. Here's a pic of Bane:

Okay, my apologies, that's LaRon Landry, SS of the Washington Redskins. And yes, that's a linebacker shoved in the socket where his arm is supposed to be a-la Mr. Potato Head.

Here's another pic that LaRon Landry released of himself today via Twitter (@MrLandry30):

And here's the actual picture of Bane:

Before I continue, I'd like to kill this speculation that at least one, or both, of the pictures are Photoshopped. People on Twitter seem to be under the impression that the pics are faked because of the tattoo not being on LaRon Landry's right arm in the initial pic, but being on his "right arm" in the second pic. If you believe anything as retarded as that, you need to be evaluated on if you're safe to remain in the wilderness, or whether you need to be held in captivity.

The picture of Landry holding the jug of protein powder is taken by someone else (notice LaRon is not holding a camera of any sort?). The picture of LaRon Landry in the hat, is taken by himself, in a mirror. For those who don't understand the laws of a mirror, they reflect an image, meaning everything appears flipped. So LaRon's right arm does not have a tattoo, his left arm does, and his left arm is not visible in the photo without the hat.

Now, since that idiocy is out of the way, allow us to focus on the idiocy of LaRon Landry. I commented on Twitter, referencing Kevin Hart from the following video:

Kevin says it all. LaRon, you've ALREADY WON! STOP IT!

What concerns me more is that, I'm pretty sure LaRon isn't supposed to be as big as he's getting, playing safety in the NFL. I'm also concerned he works out too much, which damages the muscle instead of allowing it to heal. I'm also worried that he may not be working out his legs (I wouldn't think he'd be allowed to, at least not power-lifting), so his muscle mass isn't proportionate. There's a number of things wrong with all of this, but I'm also worried because, while I understand it's possible to get this big lifting clean and I'd hate to post this here on the site, it IS a major concern of natural, common sense... is LaRon Landry taking this Bane gimmick a little too serious and adding bulk with the help of something like HGH (see Chris Brown? My "speculation" has basis)? I'd hope not, and I hope that he is doing this clean since he's doing it at all... but I really wish he wasn't doing this.

Anyways, leave a comment or follow us and discuss on Twitter @Sean_Bishop.