Thursday, January 26, 2017

Mock Royal Rumble 2017

I do not have any insider knowledge about surprise entrants into the Royal Rumble. As of me writing this, I believe there are only 22 confirmed participants for the Rumble. I also do not have any insider information about the order of the entrants, or the winner. I am just putting together a mock I think makes sense + what I would personally like to see accomplished in the match.

1. Sami Zayn - Zayn will be the Iron Man in this year's Rumble, building onto his Daniel Bryan-esque push of late with Stephanie making his life more difficult than it has to be for no apparent reason.

2. Chris Jericho - Iron Man #2. I expect both of these guys to go the distance in this year's Rumble, and Jericho's as good as any for spurts of offense in a long match.

3. Big E - We have to add some size early to immediately slow down Zayn & Jericho. In recent years, the first 10 spots in the Rumble have entered and been eliminated quickly, and we haven't seen the ring fill up until mid-match. That's going to change this year.

4. Tyler Bate - He's under contract with WWE, even though he's free to continue working in the UK (and elsewhere in Europe, I believe). He just won the WWE UK Championship, so capitalizing now could get fans who didn't watch to tune in on the Network to see more about the 19-year old Bate.

5. Sheamus - Sheamus is a Rumble winner, so him entering early is a decent story, and it adds another person to slow down Zayn and Jericho. I also would love to see a tease from Sheamus about the UK Championship with Bate.

6. Xavier Woods - Here's where we get our first look at someone teaming up as New Day gets a numbers advantage. But we won't see an elimination just yet.

7. Rusev - Rusev goes straight after Woods after his comments about Lana on RAW.

8. Baron Corbin - Corbin will hit the ring and immediately make an impact before being attacked by multiple opponents. But that won't last too long.

Corbin eliminates Tyler Bate.

9. Randy Orton - Orton will hit the ring strong, hitting his usual spots. He will fight to take out Jericho who will hold on to the ropes.

10. Tye Dillinger - Perfect 10.

At this point: Zayn, Jericho, Big E, Sheamus, Woods, Rusev, Corbin, Orton, and Dillinger are left.

11. Luke Harper - Harper and Orton will "clear" the ring, but not with eliminations. They will have a staredown, but turn to continue working at trying to take people out.

12. Kofi Kingston - New Day will all be in the ring at once. Kofi will hit the ring and New Day will try and take out Baron Corbin, but will not succeed. Kofi forced into one of his miraculous spots staying alive in the Rumble.

13. Diesel - Kevin Nash will get to re-live his Diesel return. A Diesel staredown with Corbin is best for business.

14. Dolph Ziggler - Ziggler there to add pace back to the match.

Diesel eliminates Dillinger. Turns into a superkick from Dolph and falls over the top rope a-la HBK's second Rumble victory. Diesel is eliminated.

15. Cesaro - Cesaro hits the ring and he and Sheamus immediately gain control of the ring, working together. BTW, they're no longer tag champs.

Cesaro and Sheamus work together to eliminate Kofi. Out of nowhere, Cesaro dumps Sheamus over the top rope.

16. Goldberg - Yes, it's time for Goldberg to hit the ring, and this is where things start to get interesting.

Goldberg hits EVERYONE with a Spear. He dumps Ziggler over the top. He dumps Rusev over the top. He dumps Xavier over the top.

17. Bray Wyatt - Bray hits the ring and gets right in Goldberg's face. Before Goldberg can get his hands on him, Harper and Orton pull Goldberg from the ring under the bottom rope and beat him down.

18. Braun Strowman - Strowman hits the ring, gets right in Bray's face, but instead of fighting, they focus on Big E and Sami Zayn.

19. The Miz - Miz takes his time walking to the ring seeing Braun & Bray beating people down, and seeing Goldberg on the floor being beaten by Orton and Harper still. He stays to the side.

20. Dean Ambrose - Ambrose hits ringside at full speed. He takes out Miz in the aisle, but doesn't focus on him. He runs down and hits Orton & Harper, throwing them back in the ring, Goldberg stays outside to recuperate a bit.

As Ambrose gets in the ring, Bray lays him out with Sister Abigail. Orton and Harper are butting heads again trying to get to Ambrose, and focus on each other. Big E gets involved and shoves Orton into Harper, who bumps Bray. Orton and Bray surround Harper as Strowman looks on.

At this point: Zayn, Jericho, Big E, Corbin, Orton, Harper, Cesaro, Goldberg, Bray, Braun, Miz, and Ambrose are left.

21. Erick Rowan - Rowan stalks to the ring, and puts himself between Bray and Harper. Rowan turns as if he's going to attack Harper and hits Orton instead. Bray tries to control Rowan.

Goldberg gets back in the ring and takes out Harper & Rowan. Orton and Bray jump on him.

22. Mojo Rawley - Rawley hits the ring fast, and he and Goldberg actually work together to take some people out.

Strowman eliminates Rawley, Big E, Harper, and Rowan.

23. Brock Lesnar - Brock hits the ring right away and eliminates Goldberg.

Corbin eliminates Brock Lesnar as he taunts Goldberg.

24. James Ellsworth - He's getting put in, we need to be realistic. But he will immediately get tossed by Strowman.

25. Samoa Joe - This is where things really pick up. Joe hits the ring and eliminates Bray & Cesaro.

At this point: Zayn, Jericho, Corbin, Orton, Braun, Miz, Ambrose, and Samoa Joe are left.

26. The Undertaker - It's Taker time, and everyone is trying to beat him into a corner. Taker suddenly starts throwing fists and most jump out of the ring through the middle rope. Taker sees Samoa Joe staring him down in the middle of the ring. Just before Taker gets in his face, Corbin attacks.

27. Kurt Angle - It's true... it's damn true! Kurt freakin' Angle in the Rumble match. Kurt hits the ring and goes right after Orton.

28. Eugene - He teased it and it makes sense to throw someone completely random in this late. He'll get eliminated right away by Jericho.

Miz gets in the ring and eliminates Ambrose. Miz immediately gets dumped over the top rope by Zayn. Orton eliminates Angle, only to get hit by Corbin and eliminated.

29. Big Show - Show hits the ring and this is where the Rumble sets up the final stretch.

At this point: Zayn, Jericho, Corbin, Braun, Samoa Joe, Undertaker, and Big Show are left.

Big Show eliminates Strowman and Jericho. Samoa Joe dumps Big Show.

30. The clock counts down, but nobody shows. Commentary speculates.

At this point: Zayn, Corbin, Samoa Joe, and Undertaker are left.

Undertaker is tangled up with Corbin, and Zayn tosses Corbin over the ropes as Taker holds on. Taker grabs Zayn and chokeslams him. Joe grabs Taker with the Coquina Clutch and The Deadman is fading.

Lights go out. Red lights flash.

30. Finn Balor - Making his return to the WWE at the Rumble. Finn stalks his way to the ring. Joe is waiting for the Demon King. Sami kicks Joe from behind to eliminate him.

Finn gets in the ring, stares down Zayn and looks at Taker over on the mat in the corner. Finn & Zayn grapple, Finn shoves Zayn to the corner and gets him over the top rope onto the apron. Sami hits Finn with a forearm, who responds with a high kick. Sami is off balance but not going down. Joe grabs Zayn and pulls him off of the apron to eliminate him.

Undertaker sits up behind Finn who is looking at Joe & Sami. Taker crosses his throat when the Demon King turns around. Finn doesn't play up any fear, he responds by rushing Taker, who scoops him into position for a Tombstone. Finn kicks his feet to get loose but Taker dumps Finn over the top rope and Finn lands on the apron. Finn hits Taker with a high kick. Taker stumbles back, then rushes. Finn ducks as Taker goes for a big boot and takes himself out of the ring and gets eliminated.

Your winner: Finn Balor!


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